Ri-goddamned-diculous

Ahhhh yes, to dream the impossible dream. Leaving early as a junior copywriter. I’ve been working like a farm animal all week. And I’m tired, people! It’s Good Friday, for the love of Christians! Open the cave and let us leave early!

Dramatic pause as I wait for roof to part so I can leave.

Hmph. OK, well instead of leaving early I guess I’ll just offer up some Friday fun. Some things that made me say “Well that’s just ri-goddamned-diculous” (copywriting violation: using headline in copy). You know, like a sassier version of C&C Music Factory’s “Things that make ya go hmmm….”. Only no one dies.

I think I just threw up a little in my mouth.
Read what’s
on his plane. Crui-fucking-sazy. Ewww.

A wax figure of Lindsay Lohan? You have GOT to be fucking kidding me.
Does anyone else see the irony here? A wax figure for a girl who probably pays a waxer to walk around as part of her posse? What happened to the golden days of yore when a wax figure was associated with status? Oh right. There never was such a day.

I’m on here somewhere.
Hilarious. And yet so sad.

We got muthafuckin’ snakes!
In case you haven’t heard about this,
check it out, yo. Google it. It's crazier than Tom Cruise. What was supposed to be a lame working title turned into the actual title and bloggers and commenters worldwide decided that what the world needs now is NOT love, sweet love. Nope. We need Samuel L. Jackson and a bunch of fucking snakes. Apparently using “SOaP” is the new IM equivalent to “shit happens”. Seriously. SOaP. I’m just sayin’.

No, seriously.
Watch this dog walk.

I told you people it was expensive to live in London
The $149 sandwich at Selfridge’s. Have it your way!!!!!!! You deserve a break today!!